i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
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Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
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Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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