I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Randomize