if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have started to decorate penises.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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