That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
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I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
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Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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