Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
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