who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
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I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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