Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize