Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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