i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Randomize