Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Come see our sink grown plant.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
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