Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
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I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
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Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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