Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize