I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
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