The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
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She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
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I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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