The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize