i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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