i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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