what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
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I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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