So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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