My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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