I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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