never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I think people are normalizing furries
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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