So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Randomize