You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize