it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
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I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
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Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
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