yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Can I color on your dick again?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Success! We fucked roommates!
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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