Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize