Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize