No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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