shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize