What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
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