i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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