now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
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