eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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