Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Randomize