My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize