I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
She even gives head with a lisp.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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