just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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