woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Randomize