well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize