i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
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