We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
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