Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize