OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize