so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
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If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
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Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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