he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
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