I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
So squirting runs in the family.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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