Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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