just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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