just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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